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Rant !

Oct 9, 2013

Constantly asking a single girl, 'When are you getting married?' or a newly married bride 'When are you going to have your baby?' is neither kind nor a good etiquette. Wifehood and motherhood are extremely personal decisions. Along with it, they are the kind of the decisions for which we cannot put a time slot to it by ourselves. They happen at a time when it is ordained by Allah and is a rizq from Him.  

Though our cultural practices donot dictate the concept of respecting personal boundaries, that is not what our religion teaches us. The best Muslim is he who leaves what doesnot concern him - so taught us our beloved Prophet Muhammad ﷺ  

If some one's decision regarding marriage etc donot concern you directly, quit asking her the same question over and over again. Your constant questioning is not going to hasten or delay the decisions. It is only going to put the said person in a kind of emotional stress, though most often , she might not voice ‎it !  

Belittling a girl because she is not a wife or a mother is not from our religious etiquettes. If so, Maryam Aleyha Salam or Ayesha Radia Allahu anhu would not have been our role models.  

Wifehood and motherhood are no doubt,  one of the rewarding and gratifying roles to fulfill in this life, yet it is NOT the primary role of a girl. Her first concern in life should always be  about servitude to Allah.

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